Let them die, I need shade.

⁜

10 When God saw what they did, how they turned from their evil way, God repented of the evil which he had said he would do to them; and he did not do it.  4 But it displeased Jonah exceedingly, and he was angry. 2 ¶ And he prayed to the Lord and said, “I pray you, Lord, is not this what I said when I was yet in my country? That is why I made haste to flee to Tarshish; for I knew that you are a gracious God and merciful, slow to anger, and abounding in mercy, and that you repent of evil. 3 Therefore now, O Lord, take my life from me, I beg you, for it is better for me to die than to live.” [1] (Jonah 3:10-4:3)

Yeah, it’s that time of year again. It’s Jonah’s fast, and we know what that means…more fasting on the way. For some people it’s the season of dread, for others, maybe a little bit of excitement. For me, Lent always comes with the positive dread, the dread of getting back into fitness: you know you’re going to like what it does, but that you might not like doing it, at all.

I wanted to think a little bit about Jonah’s disposition toward the work of God and his fellow-man, because if you didn’t read through the lines of the verses quoted, what he says out loud is disturbing. It’s lucky for us that Jonah has no filter, because as a result of his words, we got to hear God’s response.

You know the story, Jonah was instructed to go to Nineveh. Jonah doesn’t want to. Jonah is thrown off a ship. Jonah is sad and scared. Jonah prays. Jonah is told to go to Nineveh. Jonah does what he’s told. Jonah is angry that God is merciful. Jonah goes and sulks. Jonah sits under the shade of a tree. Jonah throws a tantrum when it dies and becomes really dramatic. Jonah is chastised.

I want to zoom in on the ‘goes and sulks’ part. We’re told, explicitly, that Jonah was very displeased, and gets angry. We then find out why Jonah wanted to abandon the mission from day one: he didn’t want to look bad. He says, God, this is exactly what I said would happen from the beginning, you’re gonna tell me to tell them this, and then You’re gonna be all nice, and then I look bad. I’d rather die than this. Now, I think that’s already a bit distressing, but it gets worse.

In a minor fit, Jonah exits the city to see what would happen. Unbeknownst to him, “the Lord God appointed a plant,b and made it come up over Jonah, that it might be a shade over his head, to save him from his discomfort. So Jonah was exceedingly glad because of the plant.[2]” Jonah is suddenly ’exceedingly glad’ after having been exceedingly displeased. Then the Lord destroys the shade with a worm, and Jonah, now bothered by the sun, asks again to die, saying ‘It is better for me to die than to live’ (4:8)

Shade > Life

So, already it’s on the stranger side that Jonah was more concerned about his dignity as a prophet than the salvation of the Ninevites. While that might be ‘messed up’ in modern terms, on some level, one might say, ‘I get it’. Honour killings still exist in the 21st century, indicating that we, as human beings, are still obsessed with dignity and human value systems over the absolute value of human life. Most would find that wrong, but at least, we can say, we ‘get’ the concept.

What’s scarier to me was that Jonah was more upset about his shade than their lives. I want to say that that’s ridiculously messed up, and I will say that, but I will also say, I think we do that all the time. We like to point out the dramatic wrong of honour killings, but don’t realise that we are always caring more about our shade. We are throwing the same tantrums as Jonah.

Let me confess, there are days that I did not want to help a friend in distress, because I wanted to chill. There are days where I drove by a homeless person in need, with money in my car, just because stopping was inconvenient because the light turned green. There are days where I wallow in self-pity about random things, while others are suffering.

I don’t think it’s as uncommon as we think, that we are obsessed over extremely trivial things, or luxuries, like shade, that we do not care about the suffering of others. Not just that we do not care, but that we actively are upset about their good fortune, because we are so worked up about what we think we are entitled to ourselves.

The problem is not just that we are upset about our shade, the problem is that we also think we are entitled to shade. We get so lost in our entitlement, that we didn’t even notice that God had planted the shade for us. How often do we think that our parents owe us things, even at the expense of their own comfort? How often do we abuse our servants and elders, as though they are supposed to give us things. How often do we stand from our soap-boxes saying what others should or ought to be doing, and the suffering they should accept if they were authentic Christians, while throwing a tantrum the minute we lose our own shade?

Jonah, unlike us, is just honest. Most of us wouldn’t even realise that we really would rather the shade than the lives of a whole people. There’s a scene from Hotel Rwanda that is forever implanted in my head, because of the truth that rung from the words of the characters:

Paul Rusesabagina : I am glad that you have shot this footage and that the world will see it. It is the only way we have a chance that people might intervene.

Jack : Yeah and if no one intervenes, is it still a good thing to show?

Paul Rusesabagina : How can they not intervene when they witness such atrocities?

Jack : I think if people see this footage they'll say, "oh my God that's horrible," and then go on eating their dinners.

See, it is easy to point out the selfishness and entitlement of others, but too often we are oblivious to our own.

God Heals

What’s more beautiful, is that Jonah’s confession of his entitlement, of his lack of desire for the good of others, is not met with the wrath of God on him. Instead, God instructs and teaches His child. He points out to Jonah that he didn’t even labour for the thing that he was wanting, that nothing came from himself. He then says, look how strongly you feel about this thing that you didn’t put the work in for, why are you upset about me wanting to save my kids?

We forget that what we have isn’t ours, and didn’t come from our own making. You might argue that you used your intellect, or your time or what-have-you. But think more deeply, and you’ll realise that you are the product of whatever you received, not what you created. You affect the environment of those who come after you, but you received whatever made you who you are – whether it’s finances, genetic predispositions, or, long and short of it, your very life.

What we are responsible for, is the choices (i.e. the loves) the we make. We are responsible for right choosing, right loving, in the circumstances in which we find ourselves. Choosing ourselves over others, loving ourselves over others, as Jonah and we do, is the anti-thesis of God, Who is love.

Perhaps this fast, we can meditate a little on what ‘shade’ we value over human life. Perhaps we can identify something specifically that I hold on to at the expense of others, and give it up, even for the fast, so that I can be part of the salvation of others’. Rather than be upset by God’s mercy, perhaps we can participate in it.

God loved Nineveh, and He loved Jonah. Both Jonah and the Ninevites needed repentance. May God grant us to see that always, so that we share His love, rather than hoard it.

¶ 4:2: Ex 34:6.

[1] The Holy Bible, Revised Standard Version; Second Catholic Edition. (San Francisco: Ignatius Press, 2006), Jon 3:10–4:3.

b Heb qiqayon, probably the castor oil plant.

[2] The Holy Bible, Revised Standard Version; Second Catholic Edition. (San Francisco: Ignatius Press, 2006), Jon 4:6.